Archive for category Dating trends
Am I The Only One?
Posted by Tech Babe in Dating tips, Dating trends, Latest, Mobile dating on May 1, 2010
You’ve been dating for a few months now and everything is fantastic. You get along, get each other’s jokes, and the sex is like no other. You’re past the “fling” stage and you know this because you actually care what he/she is doing, regardless if you choose to admit or not. The big “uh-oh” sign is scrolling across your forehead like a Dow Jones stock crawl. Could it be? Yes. You now have feelings; feelings that go beyond the physical aspect. What comes shortly after is the unknown – even scarier. All sorts of questions start flooding your head. And then the ultimate question, that most are afraid to even ask and come face to face with…”Am I the only one?” You begin to wonder if he/she is dating anyone else. Let’s face it, everyone wants to be “the only one” for someone; even the most jaded.
Let’s get real for a second. No one in their right mind will ever simply admit they’re seeing someone else, especially if you have a great thing going. Those that do were never really “into you” the way you wanted them to be “into you.” So how do you know? Here are a few tell-tale signs that require no verbal communication to get the answers you’ve been dying to ask:
Uneasy Access
Alright, this is a pretty standard no-brainer. The unanswered phone calls, unresponsive texts, and deficient email communications are fairly telling. You can never get a hold of him/her when you want to, but if it were the other way around you’d step out of business meeting to take the call.
Terms of Endearment
After dating for a while, it’s not unusual to develop pet names for one another that’s specific to what you two know about each other. “Babe,” “Baby,” “Boo,” “Sweetie” are all too generic. So generic, in fact, that these terms of endearment are acceptably interchangeable with anyone and everyone else. “Stinky Pants” or “Bubble Butt,” on the other hand, are true testaments of a private moment you two have shared…alone.
Fixed Schedule
Are you the “M-W-F” or “T-TH-S” girl/guy? If you’ve established a fixed schedule for your hang-outs together, then there’s definitely something to worry about. While you’re with each other “M-W-F,” he/she could hold a whole other relationship the other days of the week. Mix it up. Be spontaneous. (Just trust me on this one.)
My Place or…My Place Again?
This is fairly straight-forward. I get it. There are some people that make it a big deal to open up their cocoon to someone other than themselves. And for good reason, I’m sure. But after six months of dating, or whatever time frame you deem appropriate, you don’t know so much of the color of his/her sheets, then there’s a problem. Even worse, you’ve already been to his/her place many times before and defiled every piece of furniture in sight and then all of sudden, you’re back at your place and your place only.
Again, these are just a few non-verbal signs of non-exclusivity. Of course, everyone has their own past experiences to develop their own list of signs and red flags. But this should get you started if you have that burning desire to ask the question. So to answer “Am I the only one?” you already know the answer. The rest is up to you to do something or nothing about it. Either way, protect yourself physically, emotionally, and mentally.
How to Get Out of the Friend Zone
Posted by Jason X in Dating tips, Dating trends, Featured articles, Latest on April 29, 2010
The Friend Zone is a horrible place to find yourself when you’re attracted to a woman who has decided to put you there. And you’re not a real friend, because real friends can easily turn
their “friendly” relationship into Friends with Benefits. The only one who benefits here is her. Because you’ll listen to her sob stories about the men she does actually want to hook up with and you’ll do things for her because you think being nice to her and becoming her personal slave will get you in her pants. But it won’t. Stop and start the following items listed below and you’ll get out of the Friend Zone and get onto the real deal.
Stop
- Washing her back in the shower. These women not only like using you for menial tasks they don’t want to do themselves, but they really enjoy torturing you too. As tempting as it is to hop in the shower with her and her beautiful naked body, don’t do it anymore. Remember: she’s not inviting you in for sex, she’s just being a sadistic tease.
- Painting her toenails. At this point, you might as well just put on a skirt and hang up your balls, because you’re not only a “friend” but you’re now also a female. Stop immediately and let her go pay for a pedicure.
- Picking up beer and tampons at the store before coming over to hang out. Just tell her you’re out of cash. Women love men with money because of their money. But women love losers with no money because of their starving artist passion. If you’re not an artist, become one.
- Giving her advice about her problems with guys. Stop being understanding. Tell her to go cry to her mama, you’ve got better things to do.
- Complimenting her. Remember the guy she complains to you about who never compliments her and treats her like crap? That’s who she’s sleeping with. I’m not saying be like that guy; I’m saying the nice, sensitive guy you’re being isn’t working. So stop with the compliments.
- Kissing her ass. I’m not talking about the way you’d like to kiss her ass; I’m talking about agreeing with everything she says. She’s not always right. Have an opinion, cause some debate, get on her nerves. That’s what real men do.
Start
- Hooking up with other women. Yeah, I know you’re in love with this girl, but she’s not yours yet and you won’t get her by sitting around and looking like a pathetic loser other women aren’t interested in hooking up with either. This is good for both you and her. It shows her you don’t need her and… You don’t need her.
- Being sexual. Not to her, but in front of her. Talk to her about sex with other girls, point out women you think are attractive, bring up sexual situations and get her opinion. She wants to start talking about her guy problems? Start talking about your girl problems. The new girl you met wants to have sex all the time, in public places, in trees, etc. and you’re not sure you’re that into her. Now you start becoming a sexual person. Maybe not as a possibility for her yet, but you’re someone who gets laid. It’s a new ball game.
- Becoming unavailable. She calls, don’t answer. Let it go to voice mail. Then don’t call her back for hours, maybe even let it go a whole day. Not every time, but make it clear you’re not at her beckon call. And stop calling her all the time. And when you do talk, limit the phone time. Remember, you’ve got better things to do.
- Saying “No” to her. She wants to watch “The Ugly Truth” on DVD, you say no and tell her you’re in the mood for a slasher like “Saw VI”. You don’t want her too engaged anyway; you want her scared and grossed out so that she touches you and buries her head in your lap. Say no to other things too. Tell her what you want to do. Be manly.
- Using her as your wingman. You’ve only been talking about other girls; now you’re going to use her to actually get other girls. That’s what real friends do, right? If she’s seeing you differently at this point, and she should be, this will drive her nuts.
The idea behind stopping and starting these things is to position yourself as something more than a friend. You want to become a sexual possibility for her. Once you’ve put all these changes into play, you should expect sexual tension to be on the rise, and you may even get a confession from her that she might want to be more than just friends. That is something you never confess; let her take that step. If none of this works, there’s just no turning her and you should just walk away at that point. The good thing is, you’ll be seeing other women so it shouldn’t leave a huge void in your life. And don’t ever allow yourself to get in the Friend Zone again.
5 Horrifying Ways to Ditch Your Date
Posted by Jason X in Dating tips, Dating trends, Featured articles, Latest on March 31, 2010
You’re on a date and it’s turned out to be a huge mistake. Some people are prepared for this and have prepped a friend to call midway. If the date’s going well, you ignore the call. If it’s going poorly, you answer, pretend it’s an emergency and cut the date short. But these days, you’re not fooling anyone with that ploy. So if you want to spare your date’s feelings and ego, you’re going to have to get a little more creative. Below are 10 horrifying, but plausible excuses for cutting the date short. I use the word “plausible” loosely. It really depends on your delivery… 
1. Zombie Apocalypse
You’re at a restaurant with your date, excuse yourself to go to the bathroom. When you return, hold your arm and pant like you’ve just been in some sort of struggle. Announce the Zombie Apocalypse is upon us and a zombie just took a chunk out of your arm. Everyone knows ZA is a reality, it’s just a matter of time. So when your date goes sour, the time is now. Explain to your date that you’re not sure if it’s a Dawn of the Dead ZA or a 28 Days Later ZA. A DDZA means you won’t turn into a flesh eating zombie for a while. But if it’s a 28DLZA, you’ll turn almost immediately. In a desperate tone, say Don’t take any chances. Run! The downside here is that you’re left with the tab. Alternatively, you can tell your date that you’re going to quickly run to the gun store so that you can blow your own brains out. Don’t forget to thank your date for a nice time.
2. The Wolfman
Same scenario as #1, but when you return from the bathroom, pretend the water you splashed on your face is sweat and confess you were bitten by a strange wolf the other night when you were hiking in the mountains alone in the dark. Start to shake like you’re turning into the Wolfman. Grow fingernails and hair, if you can. But make your date believe you’re a blood-thirsty wolf. Don’t make the mistake of saying you’re a vampire. Both chicks and guys love vampires for some reason. With all the movies and television shows today that glorify being a vamp or bitten by one, you’ll defeat your own purpose. Put a stake in that idea immediately.
3. Murder
Use the phone call you get from your friend to let your date know that your doctor just called. It was just confirmed that you have 24 hours to live because someone murdered you. Well, with poison that takes 24 hours to kill you. Oh, and there’s no antidote, just like in DOA. So you have to quickly retrace your steps to solve your own murder. Everyone is a suspect, including your date. Eye him or her suspiciously then run out of there yelling, There’s no time to lose!
4. Psychosis
This one is pretty simple. Once you realize your date’s a dud, start quoting Norman from Psycho: You eat like a bird. But -I-I don’t really know anything about birds. My hobby is stuffing things… That should get the ball rolling. Then start talking about your relationship with your mother. Obviously, this works best for guys. She just goes a little mad sometimes. We all go a little mad sometimes. If that’s not enough, start speaking as if you are your mother: Go on, go tell her she’ll not be appeasing her ugly appetite with MY food… or my son! Or do I have tell her because you don’t have the guts! Huh, boy? You have the guts, boy? At that point, she’ll make her own excuse and cut the date short.
5. Hell and the Devil
Tell her the funny thing that happened to you today; how you accidentally knocked an old gypsy woman into the mud and she cursed you to hell. Check your watch, because apparently in the next half hour the devil will Drag Me to Hell. Of course, anyone around you will be dragged to hell along with you. If that’s not enough, switch to Exorcist mode and talk like Linda Blair. If possible, do a complete 360 with your head and projectile vomit pea soup. That always seems to be the clencher.
If you’re not going to be straight up with your date when things go south, at least have the courtesy of being creative. Sometimes the most outlandish excuses are the most believable. Because, who would seriously use these excuses if they weren’t true?
“Brangelina” – Open for Business?
Posted by Tech Babe in Dating tips, Dating trends, Featured articles, Latest on January 25, 2010
With the recent hums of Brad and Angelina’s talks of a potential split, due to the introduction of an “open” relationship, it made me wonder. Is there such a thing? And could it actually work?
According to the ever-knowing online wiki, “an open relationship is a relationship in which the participants are free to have emotional, spiritual and/or physical relationships with other partners, often within mutually agreed limits. If a couple in an open relationship is married, it can be called an open marriage.”
Really? Let me dissect this definition a bit.
“…participants are free to have emotional, spiritual and/or physical relationships with other partners.” Ok, I get the “physical” aspect of it, but I don’t understand the “emotional” or “spiritual” arms of that statement. Why on earth would anyone be in a relationship if they haven’t attained an emotional or spiritual level with that person? That’s all that’s left in relationship outside of the sex part. Call it what it is– a “hook-up.”
“…within mutually agreed limits” translates to rules. Based on a few online publications I found on this topic, all shared a first and foremost fundamental rule on open relationships: Communicate and be open to sharing your experiences. Are you f***ing kidding me with this? First of all, if you’re not already communicating with one another, you’re wasting your time. And secondly, I highly doubt any man would sit through dinner where standard table conversation would be how I got rammed in the back door by a stallion. No thank you.
Here are a few other rules I found in a single online publication on open relationships:
- Always practice safe sex outside the relationship.
- No sex with mutual friends.
- Sexual encounters must not interfere with the couple’s customary or planned time together.
- Sex is permissible only when one partner is out of town.
- Outside sex is only allowed with advance agreement with one’s lover.
- Outside sex is allowed only when both partners participate.
- Outside sex is never permitted at home.
- Sex is permitted at home, but not in the bedroom.
[Read more]
Aren’t relationships complicated enough without rules? Rules are what kills most relationships.
“If a couple in an open relationship is married, it can be called an open marriage.” Then why the hell did you get married in the first place? It would be more understandable if this was “green card” situation. Chances are, it’s not. Not in this context. Add kids to the mix and the entire family are prime candidates for a series of daytime talk shows.
Apparently, there is such a thing as open relationships, based on the wealth of online content out there on this very topic. Could it work? I don’t see how, looking at all of the rules in play. I’m no dating or relationships expert, but I’ve got a pretty good handle on common sense.
What about you?
The Jersey Shore Appeal
Posted by Tech Babe in Dating trends, Featured articles, Latest on January 15, 2010
What is it with those guys at the Jersey Shore? If there’s anything we can all take away from it, it’s the lines! Oh the lines! It’s reality entertainment at its best. What’s even more entertaining is, the lines these guys run and the attitudes they carry when they’re out “creepin’” actually work! Really?
“She ditched a zero and went for a hero.”
Mike, aka, “The Situation”, doesn’t seem to have a problem in the hook-up arena. Why? Let’s break it down. He’s self righteous, pompous, a major douche, and lives by the “GTL” credo (gym, tan, and laundry). The appeal? Confidence. Let’s face it, chicks dig assholes with confidence even though they refuse to believe so. Now that’s not 100% full proof, but a chick can at least mess around with an asshole for momentary fun.
“Girls love a DJ, so once they see me behind the wheels of steel over there, doing my thing… watch out.”
Pauly D is The Situation’s wingman which doesn’t always work out in his favor. He’s had to take more than one for the team. While he’s all about hooking up with chicks too, he’s not so obvious with it, unlike The Situation. His appeal is his style. It doesn’t hurt that he’s a DJ too.
“I would send her a picture of my dick in a pack of bubblegum & say ‘chew on this’.”
Ronnie, contrary to how the season started, is the only guy in the house that sealed a relationship with Sammie, one of the female room-mates. In more than a handful of episodes, Ronnie demonstrates his machismo attitude by “fists meeting face” against those that are threatening his pack. His appeal? He’s a protector with a sensitive side and is clear on what’s right and wrong. Chick’s totally dig this in a guy, just be smart enough not to go to jail.
“Then there are some girls that are respectful, that you have to just actually treat like girls, human beings.”
And finally, we have Vinny. Vinny’s the youngest guy in the guido household yet seems to have the most sense when it comes to chicks and hooking up. He takes a much more cool, calm, and collected approach to girl chasing. If he clicks with a girl, cool. If not, no biggie. He’s of a “chill” mindset; a “roll with the punches” kinda’ guy, which for some girls, is all they’re looking for.
Now that we have the break-down here, these guys have their own variation of appeal factors that all lead them to a successful hook-up. The girls they hook-up with are direct products of the appeal they send off.
Having said that, knowing what kind of appeal you send off and what you’re attracted to can explain why you choose the people you date. This, in turn, can save you a lot of time and energy when getting ready for your next date.
Last Minute Gift Ideas
Posted by Tech Babe in Dating tips, Dating trends, Featured articles, Latest on December 22, 2009
It’s three days before Christmas and you’re still coming up empty for that special someone. What to do? The more important question is “what to get?”
First, consider your budget. He/She isn’t earning your paycheck, so they have no right to dictate what they want from you (unless it’s sex). Next, consider their worth. How much does he/she really mean to you? Bed buddies shouldn’t expect anything (unless it’s sex). Lastly, consider the length of time you two have been dating. If you’ve made it through several holiday seasons together already, then your sheer presence should be gift enough (accompanied by sex).
I’ve compiled a few last minute gift ideas that should fit into a mix and match of these considerations.
For Her:
- Scented Candles [Tip: Stay away from floral scented candles, unless she’s an old hag. Vanilla is always a winner!]
- Foot Spa – This is a bonus for guys. Every girl needs one of these, and best of all, you won’t ever have to rub her feet again!
- Chocolate Fondue Set - If she’s feeling kinky enough, she might let you lick the chocolate off her private parts.
- Weight Scale – While chicks are always checking their weight, be careful with this one guys. This might lead to a never ending game of twenty questions. The only difference is it would be the same question over and over and over again: “Am I fat?”
- Day Spa Gift Certificate – This is the perfect gift that says “I care about your well being.” It also gets her out your hair for at least a couple of hours depending on the amount you give.
For Him:
- Gym bag – This is a multi-purpose gift. He can use it to carry his smelly gym clothes or you can use it to pack in all of his crap that he left behind at your place after you throw him out.
- Bathrobe – Nothing like cuddling up next to a man who feels like, and might be the size of, a big plush teddy bear.
- Bar Ware – This is for the man who still drinks scotch out of college party cups. (You know who you are.)
- An HD Handheld Video Cam – Only make this purchase if you don’t mind being a porn star one night. Ladies…you will be filmed.
- Best Buy Gift Card – This is the perfect gift that says “I know it’s not enough for a 50” plasma but that should be motivation to do something with your life.”
Hope this helps. If all else fails, go with booze. A good bottle with the right amount of consumption is sure to end with sex.
Have Merry Sexy Christmas!
Connection-SUCCESSFUL!
Posted by Tech Babe in Dating trends, Featured articles, Latest on November 17, 2009
After months of perusing online dating sites, creating multiple online dating profiles, playing Tetris with key characteristics, and five paychecks wasted on dry dates, a’las, you’ve found your match! Now, the million dollar question (or whatever amount you’ve dished on these online dating services, unless it’s free like PhoneFling)…
“Do you keep your online dating profiles up and active?”
After taking an independent poll, made up of a few co-workers, Twit-Heads, and even a few BFFs, I’ve concluded the answer to this question is influenced by the direct correlation between your dating objective and your dating type:
|
Dating Objective: |
Dating Type: |
Answer: |
|
Casual |
Sack-Roller |
Yes |
|
Relationship |
Cruiser |
Perhaps |
|
Marriage |
Sucker |
No |
The “Sack-Roller” isn’t looking for anything more than a roll in the sack, a pounding on the hood of a car, or a bladder stabbing in a dark corner. Like the sack-roller’s sex drive, their online dating profile will remain active.
The “Cruiser” is a bit more complex. The cruiser likes relationships and wouldn’t mind having a relationship, but is analogous to that of a job-seeker. Once a job-seeker lands that job, does the job-seeker keep his/her on-line resume updated and active? Sure. Why? Because the job-seeker is always open to newer and better opportunities, IF it exists. However, the job-seeker’s response to newer and better opportunities is swayed by their current state of contention. Meaning, offers may still come in but can be rejected or ignored if the job-seeker is perfectly satisfied with his/her current position. Just like the job-seeker, while the cruiser may keep their online dating profile active, responding to other “offers” or “requests” may be in-active.
The “Sucker…” well, I think that’s self-explanatory.
There you have it. But now that I think of it, what you do with your online dating profile post-connection isn’t really up to you, is it? No. It’s up to the “connecteee” and how they feel about you keeping it active while you’re with them. In that case, the answer is “Yes” to all. (Well that was a waste of energy.)
“I Know Who You Did Last Summer (and I know Who You’re Doing Now)”
Posted by Tech Babe in Dating trends, Featured articles, Latest, PhoneFling on November 11, 2009
Everyone’s doing it and I’m sure you have too! Whether you’re in a relationship, looking for one, or playing the host on Cheaters for yourself or for a BFF, you’ve run a person’s search online. A recent survey, conducted by Intelitech, Inc., the creators of PhoneFling, polled 275,000 of its members, and 62% support this fact.
Actually, that 62%, more specifically, have searched online for an ex. The survey results did not confirm why but come on, we all know why. For guys, it’s to see what new loser your whore of an ex is contaminating now. And for girls, it’s just what we do. I’m guessing the majority of that 62% are chicks….scorned chicks! (Guilty.)
But searching online for someone isn’t necessarily a bad thing. It’s a way to do your background checks before setting yourself up for failure all over again. But if you’re having to pay for services to obtain a person’s information, then you are borderline stalker…not cool.
Other statistics in the survey reflect how the influence of increasing social media trends, online dating included, has really changed the dating game. The popularity of online dating services has morphed from a quick and easy way to meet your match to a quick and easy way to create an online, uninhibited persona; one that some may not actually demonstrate in real life.
Surprisingly, 64.1% said that they are less likely to do this though it is a top concern. How do you know the person really is who they say they are or look the way they look in their profile in real life (IRL)? That’s just it. You don’t. But if you’re ever at a point where you are ready to take this online affair to an offline meeting “IRL”, choose a meeting location with lots of windows that face a crowded street. That way you can sneak a peek before your meeting begins. If he/she is not for you, keep going and block him/her from any of your social media networks. Otherwise, rock on and keep it wrapped! (That’s another thing that won’t be disclosed online.)
You Be Christopher Columbus and I’ll Be Your Map
Posted by Tech Babe in Dating trends, Featured articles, Latest, PhoneFling on November 3, 2009
Now that Halloween is over and just when you’re ready to toss that costume aside, stop! You don’t have to wait for Halloween to throw on a costume. Costumes are great to get a little role-playing action going. Think about all the possibilities?
- Nurse and Patient
- Teacher and School-Girl
- Cowboy and Indian
- Cop and Robber
- Politician and Intern
The possibilities are endless! The key to role playing, however, is getting into character. You can’t just wear the part. You have to be the part. It won’t work otherwise. That said, your partner has to be a willing partner and into your little game. Alcohol might be a good start to loosen you up.
On-location role playing is even more intense! However, that takes a lot more commitment from both of you. But if you’re both willing, why the hell not! Go to a bar and pretend she’s a prostitute and he’s just a regular suit and tie guy. Have him make his move and pick you up. Go to a hotel/motel and go crazy and have him pay you! (That might be a stretch, but remember, he has to be the part.)
So go ahead and hang on to that slutty costume of yours. You never know when someone is going to be in need of a naughty girl spanking.
Has dating changed in our social media world?
Posted by Kapil Pershad in Dating trends, Featured articles, Latest, Mobile dating on September 16, 2009
I wanted to let you know about something that we’ve got brewing here at PhoneFling. We’re working on a large-scale research project to work out how people’s online flirting and dating behavior has changed in this ultra-connected world.
We’re building on some of the good work that other organizations have done in this area in the past. Of particular note is the Pew Research Center who published some excellent research on online dating habits in the past. Unfortunately, the last time the research was refreshed was in 2006, so the information has already fallen behind reality.
The good news is that we are taking a pro-active approach and we will have some interesting results to share before too long. If you want to get involved in the survey, here’s the link to the online survey. Read the rest of this entry »
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