Don’t listen to anyone who says women love shy guys. They might for a minute or two, then they quickly get bored with it and move on. If you’re a shy guy and tired of that happening to you, it’s time to get out of your comfort zone and at least appear more confident so that you can score a second date.

Here are five tips on achieving success as a shy guy:

1. Relax

There are lots of ways to relax, but here’s what works best for a date:

• Alcohol –  like a shot of Irish Whiskey before you meet her. Not too much, nothing noticeable. Just enough to set you at ease. If you don’t drink, maybe you should start.
• Something cold, down your pants – you think you’re nervous now? Take a cold can of Coke and put it down your pants. Now that’s tension. Leave it there as long as you can stand, then pull it out. Watch your relaxation jump 10 notches. Do it right before you meet her if you have to.
• A Thai massage – This works best when your date is actually Thai and is willing to fondle you within the first few minutes of the date.
• Location – pick a familiar locale; somewhere you feel comfortable. Don’t pick a place a lot of confident men frequent. You come back from the bathroom and she might be gone.

2. Don’t ask permission

Don’t ask if it’s okay if you can go to the bathroom. She’s not your mommy. And what’s she going to say? No, piss your pants? You’ve got to project confidence and constantly asking permission to do little things projects insecurity. And don’t ask for permission to kiss her at the end of the night either. You should know whether or not she wants to be kissed by then anyway. If you don’t, the best way to find out is to put your left hand on her hip as you say good-night. If she wants to kiss you, she’ll immediately take her left hand and put it behind your neck. Now all you have to do is kiss her. If she doesn’t make that move, remove your hand and be on your way. You have to make the first move and the hand to the hip is the best way to avoid outright rejection–like going right for the lips when she doesn’t want it.

3. Don’t ramble

Nervous rambling is going to be a huge turn-off. You already put the cold can of Coke down your pants, so relax and let her do the talking. I know you feel the pressure to say something clever, but don’t forget: women love to talk. Come on girls, you know it’s true. So let her talk by prompting her with a few simple questions.

• Where are you from?
• Where did you go to school?
• What color are your panties?

Okay, maybe not that last one. At least, not until both of you have had a little more alcohol. But you get the point. Simple questions and then let her run with the answers. In addition, the focus is on her and not yourself (women like that too).

4. Plan your topics

There’s nothing wrong with scripting your topics of conversation beforehand so that you don’t hit a big lull. Leave out sports and Star Wars unless she brings them up (which she won’t). Here are a few examples:

• Movies – but remember, let her tell you what she likes before you bring up anything. Everyone loves movies and it usually prompts some good conversation.
• Alcohol – find out what she likes to drink and keep feeding it to her. If she’s a drinker, you’ll get some good drinking stories and maybe find out just how wild she potentially could be.
• What she likes about men – so she’ll tell you exactly what she does and doesn’t like in a man. Which will also set you at ease because she’s just given you all the answers to the test. But if she says she likes “nice guys”, don’t believe her. That’s a lie. So don’t be too nice. It’ll backfire.
• What she does for fun – this will also help you decide whether you want to go out with her again. For example, some people really like the outdoors. If you aren’t a big fan and she is, that means a lot of hiking, biking, and volleyball for you all of a sudden. Not only a good topic of conversation, but critical information to have.

5. Eye contact

Make sure you look this girl in the eyes. Don’t look at the floor or around the room; look into her eyes. That’s what being confident is. And also, you should let her catch you looking at her breasts at least once. Don’t stare at them, just give them a glance. Remember, you are a guy and she needs to know you’re a guy. Real guys look at breasts; nice guys don’t.